YES I DO!!! i just can't seem to let him go. i...love him. no, it might not be the kind of love that married adults have or w/e, but it's the most love a 13-year-old can give. and i've realized that. without him knowing, he's stolen my heart. and a piece of that will always belong to him. i need to move on, but i'm not sure i can.
one time, i was at the library reading a book, and i glance up and see a guy that for just a split second looked like him...my heart nearly jumped out of my chest. but then once i realized it wasn't him, it was the saddest feeling i've ever experienced. and another time, i heard a voice that sounded like his, and my head whipped around and i frantically searched for him, but he wasn't there. everything i do or think of makes me think of him. i remember the first time i ever saw him, 5 years ago. i walked into sunday school and he was sitting there in a white polo tucked into long khaki pants with a brown leather belt and brown shoes. he looked up and me, kinda smiled, and looked back down. nothing special about that, right? but i still remember it.
so you see, i really don't think i can just forget about him. i need him.
oh god, i sound so drama-licious. ughhhh what is wrong with me? i sound like a psycho obsessed manic!