Well, I don't doubt that Emily's glimpse of the real Trix makes her criticisms easier to swallow. After all, Emily couldn't be the only person not to notice how much they have in common. She positively aspires to that level of emotional repression!
I don't think Lorelai ever bothered showing a fake face to Jess. On the one hand, she's helping him out the same way she tried to help Dean, the way she would any person who she thought was making a mistake by accident.
On the other hand, once she has him where she wants him, she can't resist all the zingers she's been saving up. It's like she's super-Emily, on fire with all the derision she unloads the second she catches Jess vulnerable enough to listen. He must really rub her the wrong way!
Well, the joke's on her, he can treat Rory any way he wants to, and she'll still get swept away by his spontaneous romantic poofs. Unlike Dean, who did everything and got nothing but a penciled-in movie marathon that usually got canceled over homework or a fight or both.
Hah, when she heard that Stars Hollow high resented her snobbery after she became a Chiltonite, all I could think about was the times Dean roared because he felt threatened by her brains. Who started that rumor, anyway?